Stilling the soul

The weather report wasn’t joking when a gale force wind warning was issued for coastal areas on Friday.

I had been watching the swell charts on the coastal watch website all week as a massive swell was building off the coast, looking for a surfing opportunity. Having already had a taste of this swell on my day off this week I had been anticipating Friday morning when the swell was at its peak. I had built up these images in my mind of the perfect big waves I might encounter.

I had it all planned out. I was going to get up early Friday morning and hit the surf at dawn before coming into the office. Reality hit when I arrived at the cliffs overlooking Southport. The massive squalling 2-3metre swell was completely wind blown and unforgiving. As I stood there the gusts of wind literally knocked me off my feet. Once I was sitting back in my car I knew this was getting ridiculous when the car was violently rocking back and forth with the force of the wind and the rain was coming at me sideways.

Well so much for that! Don’t you hate it when you build up expectations in your mind about how things could be or ought to be? It’s even worse when you’re met head on with an uncontrollable, uncontainable storm that leaves you feeling powerless and defeated.

I find moments like these to be deeply spiritual moments and I’m not talking about those warm fuzzy feelings with God, I’m talking about those Psalm 88 feelings. You know, the kind of lament that wonders ‘what on earth is happening here? Is this real? Where are you God?’ The wind is so strong, the ocean is unforgiving and things are blowing in at you sideways and there is no way you can even find your centre let along find God in it all.

The writer of Matthew's Gospel inserts a story about a storm immediately following an explanation about the cost of following Jesus. This story doesn’t exist so much because early Christians decided to retell a story about a bunch of fishermen in a boat with Jesus during a storm. The language alone in many English translations tells us there is much more to this than a story about a storm. The story teller uses dramatic language like ‘without warning’, ‘ferocious storm’, being ‘overcome’, ‘we are perishing’! It communicates the language of the cries of the soul when we are unexpectedly overcome with the challenges life throws at us from left field.

One thing we can often overlook or not realize in the chaos of it all is that in our story as in the Gospel story, Jesus is present in the storm. The knowledge that God is present is comforting for some but not enough for others. It is the words uttered by Jesus in the midst of the storm in Mark’s Gospel that offers us the greatest hope in the midst of the storm, “Quiet! Be still!”

May you find time for the stilling of your soul.

Shalom Mark